I don’t know about you, but every time I hear the term “helicopter parenting” I want to duck for cover. It’s not that I’m so opposed to the concept as much as I’m afraid something is about to swoop down and take off my head. Usually, I’m not so far off—“Ten Warning Signs You Are a Helicopter Parent (and How to Stop)”; “You Might Be a Helicopter Parent If…”; “How Helicopter Parenting is Ruining America’s Children”. Hang on now, while I grab that head of mine rolling down the helipad and try to slap it back onto my shoulders long enough to endure all this blame. Were the latch-key 80s kids really so much better off than our helicopter ones? It’s all longitude and latitude. Last year, Marine One carried Obama. This year, it carries Trump. These little soldiers of ours evidently too afraid to parachute from our laps this decade will be raising their own kids the next, hitching rides barefoot to corner stores rolling around in the back of Amazon copter-drones.
Nah, we are what we eat, as they say. And, unless there’s some serious deviant behavior or abuse going on, then most of us end up either reacting to or repeating what we’ve experienced before, one way or another, in ways our kids can endure. We’re all just human, after all. Good to know what makes us tick and talk as we do. Nothing that about twenty-five years of psychoanalysis might not do you good for. But not only does the media whirly wind its way in to tell you that your parenting has rendered your child likely unable to pull the covers off her dorm room head, or in jail for knocking out his college professor for a B-, but they market to you too. I just now opened online one of those If-You-Love-Your-Kid-Why-Do-You-Hold-a-Pillow-Over-Her-Face-Huh?-Huh? articles from a reputable source, a box appeared over my computer screen—“Yours Free: Our Popular 6-Part-Mini-Course How to Be a Positive Parent—Want to Raise loving, happy, well-adjusted kids without the nagging, screaming, stress and drama? This mini-course gives you everything you need to know. Simply enter your email below to get started.”
Oh-my-GOOOOODDDDD! Thank you so. Much! Kick me down and then inflate me back up as easy as this pop-up window!
No. I am not a fan of the term helicopter parenting. But you just have to laugh. And duck. You should duck and laugh. The humor of overactive parents in books for kids is that it rings true. But it doesn’t cut off your head. I don’t know about you. I like my head. Next generation we’ll laugh about the humor of the latch-key kids again. Tom Sawyer, Pippy Longstocking, anyone?